The following emails were sent out to the entire sorority last night after Manoli and I left to go have dinner with Emma and Drew, unknowingly trailing blackberry cobbler juice all over the basement floor:
Date: 06 Apr 2008 20:28:54 -0400
From: a sister
Subject: blood in house
To: the sorority
who bled on the stairs/ are you ok?!
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Date: 06 Apr 2008 20:43:39 -0400
From: the same sister
Subject: update: not blood
To: the sorority
the stuff that is on the stairs and basement floor is not blood. it seems to be some type of berry juice-type thing- can whoever is responsible for spilling this just let me know.
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Date: 06 Apr 2008 21:19:35 -0400
From: the new house manager
Subject: *Seriously, the berries
To: the sorority
Seriously Thetas,
Whoever spilled berry juice and gave the first sister a heart attack needs to blitz me and clean it up. Luckily, it should clean up very easily.
thetasnscamebutweshouldhavecalledcsilove
(Ed. Note: OH NO!!! The first sister, seeing what she assumed was blood on the stairs, became very concerned for her sisters' health and safety, and called the campus security! All while Manoli, Emma, Drew and I were innocently enjoying fondue and cobbler a mere three miles away!)
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Date: 06 Apr 2008 22:51:15 -0400
From: the new houseman
Subject: Re:GOT *Seriously, the berries
To: the sorority
Apparently people have been waiting with baited breath.
The answer is probably the cobbler. So, if you were unhappy that you didn't get to eat it, go lick the floor.*
*That is a joke. Under no circumstances should you lick our basement floor.
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Lessons learned: do not make cobbler with frozen berries without defrosting and draining them first, and my sisters really do care about each other. And also, they have active imaginations.
Oh, and boiling water gets blackberry stains out of clothing, and a mop does a really nice job for the stains on the floor.
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